3 comments

1) It was more than good; we danced about 3 hours continuously. It was so fun. I can't explain my feeling :)

2) One of my contacts disappeared from my yahoo messenger list. I'm sure I didn't delete it. How come? I know even if the owner ignores me the name will stay in my list but always offline.

3) I used to be a self-confident girl. I know that I had been a girl with good communication ability, and I would say that I had the power to arrange and gather bunch of people around me. Some of my friends always told me that you have to be a manager. Gradually, I lost my ability; I don't know why.
Sometimes, I think that being an active girl who talks a lot and make noises in every group, the one who makes people to notice her is the characteristic of a young immature girl. Since I'm already 25.5 It's obvious that I should not be like that.
Sometimes, I think this happened because I changed my communication language. I'm not able to say everything I want and to maintain my special verbal ability. However, this can not be completely true because I have been changed even with my Iranian friends.
Why I started to say that?
Some weeks ago I went to downtown with some of my friends. Mostly, I don't like to drink but that night I feel like to take some beers. I took just two and I was completely sober, yet I felt some changes in my behavior. I was looking at myself that I'm back to the girl I used to be. I was easily talking in English and Persian. I wasn't scared of saying something stupid. A feeling like It's me, It's Kimia and I'm proud of myself. No shame no low self-confidence anymore. I could present myself as I really am not as a recent shy girl. I liked myself.

Now, I can not drink always to be Kimia. I have to destroy the obstacles. First, I need to recognize them.