Fantasy

I am planning to go to United States this summer. This is a multi purpose trip. The main purpose is to visit a potential employer, get to know him, the environment, the company and also have a formal job interview. It is both interesting and scary for me. I am not confident enough and I wish to have a strong supportive friend, who believes in me, would company me.

Although I am so excited to get this job, I know I am gonna have a hard time staying there for those few days. On the other hand, the second purpose of my trip which is to visit 4 friends keeps my heart warm. I had a fantasy of my stay with them(I still do).

I had written about my mysterious guy before. He was one of these 4 people that I wished to visit. Unfortunately, we haven't been talking much recently. I was busy, and so was he, yet I know it is not a good excuse. In fact, I feel he is not interested. Having said that although I kinda like him because he is so good looking to my eyes, I didn't put much effort to warm up the relationship. I think he is cold and it is a long way to get him on the line. Spending some time with him and getting to know him in person, trying to convince him to give me company to the state of interview, dreaming about arranging a driving trip to the destination were some parts of my US fantasy. I lost my motive and desire to prove my fantasy to be true. That doesn't mean I am upset or anything; I hardly get upset of something like this. This is life.

She is another part of my fantasy. She has been my classmate back home and I haven't seen her for almost two years. I wished I could stay with her at least for a day to say the story of the past two years that we hardly talked, to refresh the friendship. My bad luck is that she is going to another state in the other side of the country for internship. I guess I should wait some more years. I repeat that I am not upset whatsoever; I myself prayed for her to find a good internship or a job, whatever.

I still have dreams that keep me away from shortening my trip to a purely exhausting interview trip. It is a gift to have friends whose care and friendship is somehow independent to whatever you say, you do and you believe. I call it improved friendship, no misunderstanding.